Life is a game of musical chairs. I’m just tired of always being the last one left standing. This week I have once again been struggling with the belief that I am lagging behind in life. I am well into my 28th year of life & still struggling to find a job in the medical field (which I have a degree in) as well as someone to walk through life with. As always, this is a frustrating, disheartening mindset. But as such, it can be controlled. 

I’m sure you have heard quotes similar to the following: “you can’t control the situation, but you can control your reaction.” While this may sound cliche, it is in fact true. I experienced two highly negative issues this week. One affected me more than the other as one occurred to my friend & one occurred to me. As I listened to my friend venting about her struggle it was easy for me to stay positive & encourage her. Remind her how lucky she was & help her focus on better things. Yet when later that evening I had my own aggravating encounter, I was quickly saddened & let my anger take over. I spent the entire following day allowing my emotions to control my thoughts. 

I finally realized what I already knew, that emotions affect your reaction. When something negative is placed in your life, is easy to act quickly based on how the event makes you feel. This is not always a bad thing, sometimes we have an overwhelmingly positive reaction to things. But if we let our emotions run our mind, we will often find ourselves crouched in a corner of disappointment. Even the most outwardly confident person contains self-doubt. I read somewhere that our brain often underestimates what we are capable of. This is why we constantly overthink things. Only a true sociopath can live a life with a clear conscious. The rest of us, while some more than others, will premeditate or ruminate on things we cannot control.

While you are free to make decisions in your own life, so are others. Meaning, despite any decision you may make, situations are not always going to have your desired outcome. This leaves you making follow up decisions. We cannot control everything that happens in life. That is a simple fact. What we can control, is how we react. Emotions are not a bad thing in & of themselves. Yet, they are powerful, & when we act on them without any logic they can take control. 

Next time negativity strikes, take a step back, breathe, & try to organize your thoughts before acting out. Keep in mind that your reaction to a situation will, in many cases, affect someone else. Don’t ignite a chain of negativity. Learn to turn the other cheek, without allowing yourself to be walked on. Most importantly, stay focused. When we set goals in place & work towards those we will continue to move forward. Choosing to control your thoughts & emotions is certainly a difficult task, but it is so incredibly important. I have written before about this self control being a muscle that must be exercised. So do not be lazy! Work on feeding your thoughts into a river of positivity. Sift through, removing all the bad. Only let the good flow through. Your reward will be a happier, more carefree life. Do not rush time, it cannot be controlled. Let go of the need to be in control. ❤

“Forever I feel like a record on repeat

Time is pendulum, back & forth it swings

Yet time only moves forward on this planet that we live

People pressure time & they beg it to give

As my words remain the same

Time is constant; doesn’t change

The older you get the quicker time passes & the less you posses

So when life slips you by, then you begin to stress

Without being God, you can’t slow it down

& all your fun moments swim by & you drown

You’ll rush life away

But you want certain moments to stay

You can’t pick & choose

Time won’t be abused

So try not to wish your short time away

Be fulfilled by each moment; let every second stay

Stretch time out, as long as you can

Marinate in the now, don’t focus on future plans

The present is all the time you are promised

The future isn’t guaranteed, so with yourself be honest

Enjoy where you’re at, don’t return to past thoughts

They can’t be changed, & your present will be lost” ~Kimily Trehern