Expand Your Mind

The mind is such an amazing thing. We don’t really consider it a muscle, but in all actuality it can, & should, be exercised just like a muscle. I’ve often talked about exercising the mind in terms of building self control & focusing on positivity. Today I would like to add another ability of your brain that I feel deserves a good, consistent workout. 

Your creativity & imagination are just as important as any other aspect of your mind. Now, by this I don’t mean you need to create an imaginary friend, & become consumed with a fake reality. Rather, expand your mindset. J. K. Rowling once wrote about imagination being the ability to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes. To see their point of view. Reading is a great way to broaden your horizons & experience different points of view. Yet, as much as I love to read myself & hope others enjoy reading the things I write; we cannot rely on this alone. Reading allows you to peek into the mind of someone else. We can often gain insight in this way, yet those ideas are not original. 

It is important to think for yourself. Read, study, watch the news, do whatever it is that you enjoy doing. Learn about things happening around you, whether you feel they involve you or not. By seeing what is happening in other places in the world or to other people we can often learn how to prevent similar issues happening closer to home. That’s my political input for the day. But, enough of that!

I only say this to make the point that the more informed you are, the easier it is to develop your own personal opinion. It is such a beautiful gift to think for yourself! This does not mean you have to disagree or argue with everyone. It just means you know better who you are. It frees you to be your own person, a nonconformist. Granted, the concept of free thought scares most, as they don’t know how to experience it for themselves. Do not let the close-mindedness of others prevent you from opening your thoughts. 

I have often come to corners of my mind that frighten me. However, recently, when I reach a place that makes me uncomfortable, I just sit there with the thought & allow myself to work through it, instead of trying to instantly switch my brain to a happier place. Through this process I have experienced the unlocking of parts of my brain I didn’t know existed. 

As the meme below states, “You have an eternity to think inside the box.” Choose to be different, choose to be bold. Not just to be obnoxious & prove how smart you are, rather to experience the freedom of control. Challenge your brain, make yourself think, ask questions. Don’t settle, don’t become complacent, don’t be one of the herd. Be YOUnique! Be prepared, as you will be judged when you step outside the box. But, know that regardless how you live your life, people will judge you. So don’t let the opinions of the small minded individuals threaten your ability to be who you are. Stretch that muscle that is your brain! ❤

You’re Just in Your Cocoon

I once read a quote about the importance of knowing the difference in pace & place. I’ve also come across a few quotes about butterflies in my day. I’d like to make a comparison using these concepts. As always, I would like to remind you to remember that life is a journey. You are never going to live in the same moment or place forever, at least not until you die. Therefore, the place you are at is irrelevant. But, I have decided so is the pace at which you travel. You see, as the analogy goes, the caterpillar does not know he is about to become a beautiful butterfly. He knows no end after the cocoon, for all he knows it is death. The realization of what he will become is lost on him as he is transforming. 

So have no fear if you are still in your cocoon so to speak. You are still transforming. You are constantly learning, growing & changing whether you realize it or not. Think about it, when you see someone daily, you do not notice how they change as drastically as you would if you went a decade without seeing them & they have suddenly lost or gained 50 pounds, gotten gray hair, grown a beard, cut their hair, etc. So you may not see the changes in yourself. For after all, you live with yourself 24/7.

Everyone is in a different place in life. Some are still caterpillars on the ground, others are tucked away tightly in their cocoons, & yet there are those who have already become beautiful butterflies. Chances are, you won’t know where on your journey you are. So stop comparing yourself with others! Live your own life. & do not worry about the pace at which you are transforming. Everyones’ path is different, & people will spend different amounts of time in each stage of life. Do not stress over where you are at. If you aren’t where you want to be, be patient & continue to strive for improvement. Eventually you will emerge from your cocoon. Just keep in mind that even though you aren’t aware of the changes you are undergoing, they are occurring. There is a plan in place & constantly at work. No stage is unimportant & you are simply preparing for who you are to become. Also know that the struggle to be freed of the cocoon is going to be tough. This is also vital. A butterfly must work hard to break out of its cocoon, as this strengthens its wings. Without this effort the butterfly will be too weak to fly. So do not fear the struggle. Embrace it knowing that it is only making your wings stronger to soar away with in the future. Trust your path. Trust the time the road to maturity requires. 

Do not stress over where you are on your journey, or your “place.” & do not rush the “pace.” Growing takes time & preparation. Do not look at the butterflies in the sky & cry for not being able to fly. Do not look at the caterpillars on the ground & frown that they are dragging everyone down. Everyone, just like you, is growing & changing at their own speed, in their own way, from their own trials & tribulations. All of this is necessary to maintain balance. Trust the cycle. ❤

Learning to Let Go

Letting go is becoming all I know. I am learning to surrender to circumstances I cannot control. I have often told others to let go of things they can’t control. Tell them not to let it affect them, just shake it off or ignore it, it will only add stress to your life. Yet, this is a practice that I have struggled to put into place for myself. 

For years I have let guilt, shame, & fear rule my life. I cared so much about how I was viewed by others. I constantly degraded myself for not pleasing everyone, not realizing how many people actually did appreciate me. I was too concerned with those who didn’t care for me that I took for granted people who were grateful to have me in their life. The ugly truth of the matter is that you will never successfully satisfy everyone you come into contact with. It’s impossible. Think about it. If Jesus couldn’t do it, neither will you be able to. Hate to burst your bubble. #SorryNotSorry This realization was highly enlightening & freeing for me. I began to feel lighter. The burden of others’ negative opinions was no longer a gorilla sitting on my chest. I started to notice more positive things about myself & wonder why I wasted so much time trying to impress people who deserve to posses no portion of my attention. 

Time was my worst enemy. I judged myself & based my level of “success” on what I had or had not accomplished up to this point in my life. I hated the fact that I am 28 years old & still haven’t found a spouse or even someone to be in a relationship with. I was angry for having still not posted my poetry, most of which has never been read, in some form of book. I couldn’t stand the fact that I found myself back in school & have yet to start my career. I felt my  body clock ticking on having a child, especially given I only have one ovary. Just to be clear, I believe finding a husband comes before having a child, & thus I felt even more pressure in that area of my life. I felt myself aging, using my schedule & exhaustion as an excuse to refrain from exercise, but the reality is that I had such low self esteem that I wasn’t motivated to take care of my body because I didn’t believe it deserved to be treated or look any better than my mental state. 

I was recently reminded how important it is to take care of yourself. To set goals, break them down, & work towards them. Set target dates to accomplish these mile markers & reward yourself when you reach your ultimate milestone. My buddy recommended a book for me to read & a specific journal to help me break down my goals & work on increasing gratitude in my life. I will admit, I have not committed as much time as I should have to these materials, or at least not as much as I would have liked to. & I am certainly still figuring out how to utilize them. Yet, even this slight inspiration has made a world of difference in my life thus far. Three weeks ago I was in a very dark place! & I had been in that place for a few months. I thought I hid it well, but of course my mother saw right through it all. In fact, she is the main reason I noticed how much better I am feeling these days. She pointed out last week what a change she has seen in me, my whole demeanor. She used the term “fighter” to describe me & that gave me a new sense of power. I realized for the first time that I am making positive strides. I am cutting negative ties, setting goals, & working towards the future I want for myself. It is an immensely good feeling to realize that you genuinely ceased to care about the opinion of others who have belittled you & suffocated you for so long, when they are going nowhere themselves. 

I had once heard someone say that it is easier for someone to pull you down from a chair than you to pull them up onto it. It finally clicked with me that I had been letting others pull me down for so long. I am no longer letting that happen. I may not be able to pull them up to my level with me, but I am certainly not looking down anymore. I am vowing to only heed the wisdom of those more driven than myself. I’m not waiting for the new year to start my resolution. I can’t change the past & I won’t worry about the future. I will trust God’s timing, knowing that it is perfect & it is absolute. It is not relative to what I want, but I have to make moves to make it happen. You can’t expect things to happen if all you do is sit & wait. 

PSA: Check out the book my pal recommended for me (link below)

“Own the day, Own Your Life” ~Aubrey Marcus ❤

What makes you free?

I live in a country that was founded on freedom, yet I feel I am a slave. I have all of the opportunities & choices in the world laid out before me. I have a proper education. & to be completely honest, I thought that was enough. I got my degree in German & International Studies & was convinced that was all I would need to travel the world. But as it turns out, that is not. Travel costs money & very few jobs actually sponsor travel. My job entitles me to work for the government & such. But, I have no interest in that sort of thing. I want freedom. I don’t want to be strapped down by a daily obligation to the law five days a week. I don’t want to sit at a desk or in any sort of office & consort with others who are content to live that lifestyle. I want to be free, I want to be me. Wild hearts weren’t meant to be broken & I’m ready to set mine free!

I know what controls me. It’s my obsession with money! The fact that I was born with a “silver suppository” up my ass & never had to work for anything I truly wanted. My life was handed to me on a platter as I grew up, I never wanted for anything & that was the worst thing my parents could have ever done for me because it didn’t teach me to fight for anything! They still support me as long as I “obey” their rules & pretend to be the person they want me to be. But I’m tired of the facade.  Tired of putting on an act just to please the hand that feeds me. I am so over feeling like someone’s property, I want the courage to fight for a life worth living, but I don’t know where to find it. I guess that’s why I am writing this post. If anyone reading this is truly following their dreams. If you have ever risked everything in order to be free to be the person you always wanted to be. To live the life you’ve always wanted, without being controlled by anyone or anything else. To live an exotic, exciting life others could only dream of… PLEASE reach out to me! Go to my contact page & tell me your story! I’d love to hear what you have to share! ❤

PS

I feel like a tiny, shriveled up, atrophied bundle of cells. I want to grow! But I can’t do that when I’m hovering under the shade of the hand that feeds me. I have to be willing to run out into the sun & trust that water will fall from the sky to nourish me. I need to rely less on being served & be willing to weather the elements. Flowers don’t grow inside. Nothing kept in captivity flourishes as it does in the wild