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Ms Wyoming World Universal

I have not been very active on my blog lately to post about my current title, but I just wanted to take a moment to do that now. I currently hold the title of Ms. Wyoming World Universal & I will be returning home to New Orleans, LA to compete for the national title of Ms. USA World Universal in less than two weeks! I am very excited for this journey with this brand new pageant system! I have already met so many amazing women from all around the country & even globe. These women are driven, independent, strong, creative, beautiful and so inspiring! I have already gained so much from this experience & hope that I continue to grow through this process. I hope that you will support me along my journey. You can follow my Facebook page here:

http://www.facebook.com/MsWyoWU

Also, I would really appreciate your votes for People’s Choice. The winner of People’s Choice is guaranteed a spot in the finals as well as receives a donation to the charity of her choice. The charity I have chosen is B the Difference. B the Difference is a nonprofit organization created by the sisters of my late friend Brandon to raise funds/awareness for research for a cure for neurofibromatosis (NF). B the Difference provides families of children with NF the opportunity to go on “B Happy” trips where they are able to escape the monotonous routine of doctors & treatments so they can relax like everyone deserves. You can vote for me at the following link, votes are $1 & you can vote as many (or as few) times as you’d like. I appreciate your help & support, thank you! ❤

https://www.worlduniversalproductions.com/ms-usa-universal-world?pgid=kfimkaqi-a6d95af7-d6e3-41da-8e6d-fb420ce4af34

Lastly, I have recently started a new platform called Dissipate the Hate, which is all about learning to embrace diversity. If you are interested in learning more about how to get involved in Dissipate the Hate, please don’t hesitate to reach out! Let’s be the generation that smashes stereotypes & conquers the divide!

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Daily writing #2

So I would like to start by saying that I have uploaded all of the official photos from the MAC state pageant to http://www.facebook.com/MsLAcoed14 be sure to go check them out & don’t forget to like the page while you’re there for continued updates!

Second, don’t forget to check out my good friend Rachael’s blog http://www.rachaelleestroud.wordpress.com and remember that her new e-book is available at http://www.rachaelleestroud.wordpress.com/2014/08/11/coffee-and-keyboards-my-new-e-book-is-available-now/

Now, for todays daily writing I chose to do another of one of Rachael’s ideas. I am going to talk about how some song lyrics relate to my life right now. I actually just googled a song to go with a situation I’m in & I think the first one that popped up fits PERFECTLY! I cut out some of the repetition of the chorus, but here are the lyrics to the Hoobastank song, “Running Away.”

 

“I don’t want you, to give it all up

And leave your own life, collecting dust

And I don’t want you, to feel sorry for me

You never gave us, a chance to be

 

And I don’t need you, to be by my side

To tell me, that everything’s alright

I just wanted you, to tell me the truth

You know I’d do that for you

 

So why are you running away?

Why are you running away?

 

Cause I did enough, to show you that I

Was willing to give, and sacrifice

And I was the one, who was lifting you up

When you thought your life had had enough

 

And when I get close, you turn away

There’s nothing that I can do or say

So now I need you, to tell me the truth

You know I’d do that for you

 

Is it me, is it you?

Nothing that, I can do

To make you, change your mind – no

 

So why are you running away?

Why are you running away? (what is it, I have to say)

 

So why are you running away? (to make you admit, you’re afraid)

Why are you running away?”

 

You don’t have to continue reading if this post has gotten too long for you, I am just going to use this as an opportunity to vent basically. Perhaps the lyrics spoke to you & you just need to know that you are not the only one in your position. 

Basically, this is something I have been dealing with, the guy I am interested in has decided to run away from all that our relationship offered him. & just like the song says, don’t feel sorry for me, I believe that, he’s the one I feel sorry for never giving us a real chance, he has no idea what all he’s missing. 

& I don’t need him to sit & lie to me saying things are going to be okay when I know that is not true, his silence is hurting me more than his honesty. He hasn’t officially told me he wants to end things & if he does he needs to be up front with me & say that rather than continuing to string me along like he is. Honesty is ALWAYS the best policy, whether you think the other person wants to hear what you have to say or not. 

I understand that my guy has not had many people really be there for him in his life, for example he hasn’t seen his mom since he was about 3 months old. To him people aren’t reliable & I get that, but I really thought I had done enough to prove that I was different, I wanted to be a permanent fixture. At the same time I told him I would never try to hold him back & I have absolutely no interest in suffocating him, yet he is still running away. We are already long distance & he is moving even farther away rather than closer to me. He told me if we were in the same place he would fall in love with me. So does that scare him? Is that why he’s moving away rather than stay or come closer? I wish he could learn to trust. Me. & himself.

I know I can’t change his mind though, he’s hardheaded & stubborn just like I used to be. So I’m not going to try, I know he needs to figure things out on his own, just like I had to do for myself. 

There’s a lot more to the story I am not going to share to the general public, but I do know he is scared & he is running, just like in this song & I just want to know, “What is it, I have to say… to make you admit, you’re afraid?”